It feels good to be back after being lost!
It was going to be his first time. Therefore his hands were shaking and he was having second thoughts about it. But then he also knew that both of his options would leave him hurt anyway. So, he chose the one which would at least be in someone else’s favor.
He committed the sin. YEAH SIN. Not for his own luxury or pleasure but for (that) someone else’s betterment. And he knew from the beginning that in the end he would be dejected. But one thing for which he was not ready. I mean seriously he wasn’t ready. That all of his sacrifice of his most precious thing (relation) would go in vain. And for whose wellbeing he risked his values would not even give him the chance of explanation for his action.
This broke him completely. He had his alibi along with him all the time. But for no use. His intentions were taken negatively, this was the worst part of the story.
what do you do then? Prove your self by self-justification or leave for good?